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I always dreamed of being a court jester.…

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Prelude: An Ethos

There is no ethical consumption under capitalism.

This is a phrase that is usually shorthand for “in a capitalist system, the surplus value workers produce is given to shareholders as profit and dividends, rather than being directly returned to those who produce it; therefore, all consumption inherently steals from someone”. I don’t have a source for that; I made it up. Go read Marx or something. I sort of agree with this, but I’m a dirty neoliberal globalist Aristotelian shill who seeks to invert words and make them lose their meaning.…

The Curtains

I was a 17-year-old recovering edgelord sitting at my desk on the first day of AP Literature and Composition, which is basically an English class for super-geeks like myself. Our teacher walked into the classroom, and I expected nothing; I only took this class at first in order to challenge myself, put another test on my college application, and maybe get out of a mandatory English requirement. I didn’t; not because I didn’t pass the test, but because my college required me to take their writing course anyway.

It wasn’t all for naught. Our teacher drew a circle on the board, and started to explain an important concept to us. I could never really articulate it in words, but this simple diagram pieced a bunch of what I was trying to aim for together, and taught me a valuable lesson. Here it is. The whole reason you’re in English class.

Have I told you the parable of the chicken?

Half of what’s in here has already been said. I’m building to the half that hasn’t. If Homestuck made The Legend of Korra look like Republican propaganda, then She-Ra made Homestuck look like Mein Kampf. Multiple examples of gay and lesbian couples, including the two main characters and their developed relationship over the course of five seasons. Nobody’s head gets cut off. No teenagers get drunk and fall down stairs. Nobody has to make out after one or both parties are dead. These relationships and spontaneous gestures of romantic affection are treated as normal and accepted in their universe. The final shot of the series is two couples, one gay and one straight, celebrating their love and friendship while looking upon a newly rejuvenated world.

This is not how the real world works. I’m going to point out a few big mistakes I’ve seen people make when talking about representation.